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Sleepy Hollow Recap: Kindred Spirits

Abbie's back. Crane's back. Not since Bo and Luke Duke came back to kick Coy and Vance to the curb have I been so excited to see a duo reunited, ready to kick some ass. Speaking of the Dukes, is that a Dodge Charger sliding onto the screen? Or is it a Camero? I should really know the difference but then I'd have to give a rat's ass.

Inside the car is the Vampire Garrett's less attractive non-supernatural cousin trying to stick his tongue down not-Bella's throat. Or whomever she is. She tries to tell Mr. Ugly she doesn't want any part of that so he decides to sexually assault her. Fortunately for her, in this game of Ugly, Monster, Scissors, Monster always beats Ugly. Or not so fortunate, as The Kindred is here to save her, murder the would be rapist, and then murder her. That's not how that's supposed to go! Last we saw the Kindred, the zombie soldier created by Benjamin Franklin and brought to life by Abbie and Ichabod, he was fighting Death and War in a misguided effort to free Katrina during that uh interesting storyline during season two. Looks like he's not into helping people now. Welcome to Friday night in Sleepy Hollow.

Across town, Crane is woken up when he realizes Abbie is awake staring at the chess board. (Ichabod is just a pawn in this queen's long end game). Abbie is suffering from post-catacombs traumatic stress syndrome, trying to get used to life back on earth. Crane wants to talk about her trauma, but Abbie just wants to know why he killed all her house plants while she was gone. Crane's only excuse? He spent every waking moment trying to find her. Awwww!! But Abbie's not impressed, and leaves for a two hour run. Good grief girl! There's a lot more exciting things to do for two hours back at the house.

Plus, she left Crane to wander on his own right into the path of a bitter Ms. Corinth aka Zoe aka Leave Now Missy at the local nature center. Zoe's pissed because it's been more than a month since she heard from Crane. Yes! Crane tries to spit out why he's been AWOL (absent without love) but Zoe wants him to drop the 18th century act (isn't that why she liked him in the first place?) and says she didn't think he was the "ghosting" type. Oh if you only knew Miss Zoe Corinth Scruffy Looking Nerf Herder says Crane. Zoe storms off but not without first suggesting Crane buy a cactus instead of ferns for Abbie. Yikes.

Abbie, meanwhile, can't keep from flashing back to her time stuck on the "Lost" island. Jack has no chance of convincing her to go back. Thankfully, Abbie gets a phone call from Agent Reynolds. Wait, what? Eh, if it gets our girl moving... He's called her in to help on The Kindred murders. (Seriously, is that a Dodge Charger?) Abbie reveals her cover story: she left town abruptly, quitting her job at the FBI without any word to anybody. Reynolds is still not over her or the fact that she left so he wants her by his side working this case. Apparently there's been a string of couple murders as an apparent serial killer tries to bring to life campfire horror stories. Abbie quickly assesses the situation, realizing the killer is a large ax and spear wielding monster. As soon as she figures out it's the Kindred, she makes an excuse and tries to hightail it out of there, but Reynolds isn't letting her leave.

Reynolds tells Abbie he never turned in her resignation. He wanted to give her a chance to correct her illegal behavior. Is it illegal to quit a job at the FBI? But Abbie puts her foot down. Tells him to use Agent Foster and to leave her alone. Before Abbie can leave, Sophie tracks her down and gives Abbie the secret "hey this is really a monster isn't it" password. Abbie invites Sophie back to the archives and immediately calls Crane. Ichabod only wants to talk about the beautiful home he is building for the two of them, but Abbie gives him the bad news: the Kindred is back. And you know what that means. Abbie and Crane will have to go undercover as a couple! (Please?)(And by the way, 3 couples murdered in a week by a guy who cuts off their limbs? The FBI seems strangely unimpressed by this).

15 minutes in we're made to suffer treated to Pandora and the Hidden One. The Kindred is back thanks to their shenanigans. His Royal Cluelessness wants to know why Pandy doesn't have her usual sparkle. She reminds him it's because he sucked the power out of her in a way that was totally un-Valentine's Day like, leaving her depressed and pissed. HRC is totally okay with that because now he has all the power. They're talking about boxes and supernatural couple stuff and honestly I fell asleep. Bottom line? IDK. They're going to couple's counseling.

Sophie is meanwhile trying to understand the whole Benjamin Franklin, monster raising crazy tale that produced the Kindred. Crane and Abbie fill her in and then send Agent Foster off in search of great date spots. To help catch the monster. Not for any other romantic reasons. Crane pulls out some Kindred making friendship bracelets from his memory chest. Abbie's all, "Not another Betsy keepsake!" It's our first Betsyback! Miss Ross spent hours braiding leather thingamajigs to sew together the Kindred. That's when Crane found her toiling away in the basement of Franklin's house. Turns out it's their first meeting, a blind date set up by Benjamin F. You Ranklin, pushing Crane and Ross together. Betsy's not impressed. Neither is Crane. They agree to try a mission together anyway.

Back in the modern era, Crane fills Abbie in on Franklin's experiments with other zombie like creatures, Kindred proxies he studied in the hopes of learning how to control the Kindred. Abbie discovers some results of Franklin's studies tucked away in one of his notebooks. It is written in Franklin's own alphabet so Crane sets about reading it to Abbie. She cuts him off, finishing it for him: you left for a year Crane. Abbie had time to learn all kinds of new things.

Wait, what just happened? Joe and Jenny are being called in to find Franklin's magical glass harmonica. Rewind. Why do we need a glass harmonica? Apparently it soothes the Kindred. Clearly Franklin never played any Huey Lewis on the harmonica or the Kindred would be rocking out. Jenny and Joe break into the Franklin glass harmonica museum and retrieve the device (which looks more like a huge glass seashell than a harmonica).

Underground in the catacombs of Sleepy Hollow, Crane is walking and texting. It's bad news for Ichabod. Miss Corinth is texting him asking for a book back she lent to him. Crane thinks this is good news. It means she wants to see him. Abbie fills him in on how it pretty much means that he blew it with the Zoenator. I cry. Not at all. Abbie moves on, finding evidence the Kindred has been back to his coffin. What they find there leads the duo to conclude the Kindred is turning human. Is this a good thing?

Meanwhile, the Kindred has found another couple he wants to kill. Luckily for them, Agent Foster is there firing bullets at the Kindred that do absolutely nothing. He starts to stalk after her, but then changes his mind. He goes for the Fonzie exit, snapping his fingers to call his horse to him before riding away.

Sophie rushes back to casually not tell Crane and Abbie anything. Seriously, she doesn't tell them how bullets did nothing or about the Kindred's Arthur Fonzarelli impression. Abbie shares her and Crane's theory that the Kindred is killing couples because he's jealous of the love he cannot have. Kind of like if Ichabbie fans were to cheer the death of popular couples (Matthew and Mary on Downton Abbey, Jack and Rose on the Titanic) because we can't have our favorite couple together.

Crane and Abbie find a tune that will lure the Kindred into the Headless Containment cell while Joe and Jenny debate the merits of her finally trying to talk to her dad as they put together the glass harmonica. Joe thinks she should try and talk to him no matter how Abbie feels about it. Jenny's not sure, but what she is sure of is that she needs some sheet music to get started playing the glass harmonica. Crane realizes he left it at the archives and rushes back to get it only to be stopped by Zoe. (I'm going to say her name like THIS). She's really pushing to get that book back. Sadly for her, Crane doesn't even remember the name of her book or where it is. Ouch.

Ichabod is desperate to get back to Abbie (and Joe and Jenny I suppose) and tries to gently tell Zoe that he's busy. She just isn't having it, demanding answers from him, delaying him long enough that the Kindred wakes up before he can get back with the music. Jenny tells Joe to go ahead and try and play something (talk about performance under pressure). The music seems to be working as the Kindred starts to follow Joe and Jenny. He soon gets distracted by Zoe and Crane arguing and rushes towards the bickering "couple." On his way, the Kindred drops a paper he was carrying.

Abbie picks it up and sees it is a picture of a woman put together with different pieces of people. She realizes what the Kindred really wants is a wife. You know who won't be anyone's wife anytime soon? Zoe. She's lecturing Crane, telling him she'd even told her family about him. (A bit premature there Zoester). Before Zoe can leave, the Kindred is there. Welcome to the Sleepy Hollow club Zoe. Yay. Crane grabs a sword and tries to fight off the Kindred, but the monster soon has Zoe in his clutches. Zoe promptly faints. The Kindred tells Crane that if he follows him, Zoe will die. Oh, joy. Is this Katrina Part Deux? Damsel in distress at hands of ugly monster. You know Crane can't resist that.

Abbie figures out that the Kindred must've taken Zoe to the Carriage House where Headless tried to marry Katrina. She sends Agent Foster in that direction while she, Joe, Jenny, and Crane try to figure out how to stop the Kindred. Joe recognizes a symbol on the cover of one of Franklin's books as the same symbol he saw on a door at the theater where they stole the glass harmonica. Which leads to a Betsyback. For gods sake. How many loves of Crane that are not Abbie can you pack into one show?

Crane and Ross's first mission together was to hide medical supplies. In an opera house? 18th century Crane didn't think anything about it, but 21st century Crane realizes those weren't just medical supplies. They were part of Franklin's Kindred experiments. And the symbol is actually the universal symbol for woman. And old Benji was making a female counterpart for the Kindred as a fail safe? I may have to watch that again.

Anyway, Zoe is tied up in a barn behind the carriage house while the Kindred passes restlessly. Agent Foster is there and has eyes on the situation. She relays the information to Abbie who has made her way back to the opera house where Ichabod reveals the Kindress! A female monster for our lonely hearts Kindred. Isn't she lovely...

The gang rush the bride of Frankenstein to the carriage house. While Abbie and Crane unpack the bride to be, Joe and Jenny rush to help an Agent Foster who has suddenly come face to face with the Kindred. Joe and Jenny shoot arrows through the Kindred temporarily containing him as Zoe faints. Again. And just because things weren't exciting enough, the Kindred goes all Mrs. O'Leary's cow on us, knocking a lantern over, setting fire to the barn.

While his past love life goes up in flames, Crane reads Greek poetry to Abbie. Actually he recites the incantation that brings the Kindress to life. Seems unfair if her love is currently going up in flames. She's not friendly, either, taking a swing at Abbie. The gang is cornered as the two monsters rush at them, only to stop, and gaze across the way at each other. Seriously. And then it's a zombie kiss. What do baby zombies look like? The two love birds wander off into the night leaving Ichabod to comment, "Well....That was odd." Abbie's face says it all. Seriously. The course of true love never did feature zombies before tonight.

As a reward for starring in this undead love story, Zoe gets to go to the FBI and try and describe what she saw. Which wasn't much as she was passed out most of the time. Agent Foster meanwhile encourages Reynolds to tell Abbie how important she is to him (Shhh, Sophie!) as Crane chases down Zoe in the parking lot. He's finally giving her book back. Crane apologizes and says he cares for her deeply, he just isn't ready to be that committed to someone. Zoe thinks that he is (*cough cough* Abbie *cough*), but it just isn't her. With a graceful bow Crane says goodbye to Zoe. Sigh of relief.

Except Reynolds is at the house. Reynolds is at the house! Where are you man? Get home right now Mr. Crane! Reynolds drops the love bomb on her, telling her that he loved her back at the academy, and that he just wants her to be happy. Abbie blinks, rapidly. After taking it all in, she tells Reynolds she's ready to go back to work. Reynolds is glad to hear it.

From loves lost to loves I don't care about, the Hidden One and Pandy continue to bore, awaiting the Kindred. Pandy is still bitching about not having her powers back. The Hidden One doesn't care, and totally ignores her as he sees that the Kindred is leaving Sleepy Hollow with his new love. This does not go over well. And with one swipe, he blows up the Kindred and the Kindress. And that means no sex for Pandy (human urges are out).

Back home, Crane and Abbie are trying to play chess, but Abbie is not impressed with Crane's moves. They both admit their minds have been elsewhere. Abbie also wants to know if they're really going with the Tex-Mex decor. "Yes, we're a succulent family now," says Crane. As Abbie goes to crack open another beer using her bare hands she cuts herself. Without realizing it, Abbie begins to draw a symbol in the blood dripping from her finger. When she realizes what she's done, Abbie recognizes it as a symbol she saw in the other world. Rather than show Crane and ask for help, she covers it up with her arm. What does this mean? We're not going to find out tonight!

That's all for this episode of Sleepy Hollow. What did you think of revisiting all of Crane's loves? What is really going on with Abbie? And will someone please make sure Zoe doesn't not come back for anymore visits? See you next week Sleepyheads!
Sleepy Hollow Recap: Kindred Spirits Reviewed by Deborah Thompson on 12:49 AM Rating: 5

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